Kuya's Girl

Aside from being a Papa's girl, I must say I'm also a Kuya's girl, especially to my second older brother. One can say he kindah spoiled me with material stuff and attention, but, more than that, my Kuya is also one of the few people I can be myself without any fear of consequences. I can be funny, bitchy, nice, angry or even stupid with him and I can be very sure that I won't be judged. I miss my Kuya and one of my dearest wish is to be able to visit him and hear him sing (since he's been bragging how good he is now!).

Headaches

After taking into careful consideration the factors that could possibly attibute to my excruciating and extremely inconvenient headaches, I finally realized that I have several options to mark as causes:
1. late nights - blame it to blogging! seriously, i enjoy the chatting, surfing and other stuff you can do that sleep seemed to be a bother.
2. perfume - oh yeah! blame it to smell pollution.
3. caffeine overdose - now that is one factor I would never admit to even if it's true!



*photo courtesy of www.flickr.com

Changes

Again, I'm standing at a crossroad. I need to decide should I make a turn or stay put. Mercy! I so do not like this feeling. I have always been more comfortable with the familiar but I am very much aware that although change could be scary, it's the very thing that could make me a stronger person.

Of course, I know that there is no perfect situation. Somehow, someway, there will be something we won't be agreeable with. But, it's how we handle situation that would make it perfect. Now if only I can find that skill and, maybe then I won't be scared of change anymore.

Insecurity and Selfishness

It's a sad, sad thing to see people being eat up with insecurity and selfishness that they forget their humanity. Admittedly, I also have my insecurities and I do have my bouts of selfishness but I do try to escape from these traps. Insecurity erodes not only your zest for life but the innate goodness in yourself as well. Selfishness re-focuses your energy to what you want at all cost with nary a thought to what is right.

Fairy Tale

I don't know about you but I grew up thinking that the life is like a fairy tale. If you did something good, you'll be rewarded and every story ends happily ever after.

Well, I'm now actually pushing 40 and, well, I don't see any fairy tale unfolding (yet!).... Not that I'm expecting one because the bubble had already burst, like so 10 years ago, but somehow therein lies STILL a romantic in me. Although I'm not thinking anymore in terms of weddings and stuff (time to get real!), I dream now of a peaceful life (and successful won't be all that bad).

Tupperware Party

At the risk of being eternally ostracized in my workplace (hehehe), I'm still gonna say this, I have realized that for five days a week, I'm attending a big tupperware party. Why? I had learned that true friendships are rare among co-workers. Everybody (oh yeah, the list does include me sometimes) has ulterior motives that require to use (and, for the ambitious, abuse) other people, plus we have monthly income to boot!

Patience is Virtue

For the longest time this has always been a funny thing for me (please forgive if I had or, most probably, will offend anybody), but I have always say this, Patience is virtue, unfortunately I'm not a virtuous person. Funny right? Admit it, you're laughing yourself sick. Okay, there's a shadow of a smile trying to break free....

Seriously, I really envy those people whose patience runs deeper than the abyss. They can honestly enjoy the luxury of the wait and bask at their ultimate success. Me? Nah..... I'm an antsy person (might come from all those MUGS of coffee I've had?). I want things done RIGHT NOW or NOT AT ALL. Contradicting? Yeah, oxymoronic even! hehehehe

I've tried to be really patient with people, places and things around me. Scout's Honor! I tried to mask any impatience I might be feeling with a smile or I'll just think of some inanities to humor myself. In fairness, it did work FOR A WHILE. The bad thing there is that all the impatience have amassed to such an infinite quantity.

It's so hard not to explode at the slightest provocation (it could be a careless comment, nonchalance or I just happen to not like that person's face at the moment! hehehe) and I honestly believe that I'm starting to develop a personality discorder with all this control.

Ang Taba Mo!

Promise, the moment I hear the comment, "Ang Taba Mo!" one more time.... grrrrrr!!!!!!! Kasama ba sa listahan ng physical injuries ang manapak?!?

I'm not naman denying the fact na OO, MATABA AKO, pero kailangan pang ulit-ulitin yun na parang wala na akong ibang nagawang maganda o may saysay kahit kaunti sa buhay maliban sa katabaan ko? Nakakapikon na....

Cute bang tanungin ako nang, "pumapayat ka yata?" Haller?!? Malabo lang mata ko, hindi ako bulag! There's no need na magpaka-plastic pa! Diretushin na nang matapos pero ang frustration ko lang dyan eh wala na bang ibang masasabi sa akin kundi yun?!? Oo, alam ko, masagwang tingnan, hindi kaaya-aya, at kung anu-ano pang nega pang reaction. But, this is me! Kung hindi nyo kayang tanggapin ako, cellulites and all, eh thank you very much na lang po. Pero, tama na talaga at malapit na akong magwala!

Happy Ending

With all the horror stories going around, I have started to discount the reality of happy endings. I have been hearing a lot of those tragic happenings that the idea of perfect life has become an impossible dream.

Maybe it's the fear talking or maybe it's the ignorance taking over but would it be so incredibly stupid of a person to enter into what have become hellish experiences to a lot of people I know very well. I know that I should not lose the idealistic side of my person, but, hey, it would be only difficult, but extremely difficult to remain positive amidst all the negative aura swirling around me. On the other hand, I should not endeavor to sustain whatever positive energy I might still have because it is the only thing that will help survive.

Hopefully, someday, I can see with my eyes that happy ending can still be a reality and I can feel their smiles not just see them.

80s Music

I really don't know what came over me but I suddenly got hit with an urge to listen to 80's music, be it foreign or OPM.

Maybe I'm just missing the carefree times, maybe I just need to enjoy the soothing quality or maybe I'm just too tired of the noise that kids nowadays call music. Don't get me wrong, I do appreciate some of the songs release this decade but, somehow, they don't seem to have that timeless appeal of the 80s music.

Words to Live By

I was watching a news on item on cable regarding the First Lady of new Taiwanese President. She visited a school and was happily playing with the children. Before she left, she advised the children never forget these words and liberally use them, "Please", "Thank You" and "Sorry."

As simple as these words may sound, they are by far the most important words in any language.

WHATEVER!!!!

Most of the time, I'm so beyond amazement on the intricate workings of the human minds, well, except for my mind because it usually does not do what it supposed to do.

Although I must admit I'm also guilty on that regard a lot of times (I do try not to commit the same crime ever again!), I can't help but shake my hand at the incredible assumption people make about me. Well, I'm guess I'm not crowned as the most misinterpreted, misconstrued and all the other possible mis-ses in the world for the nothing. Again, I've trying rocking my brains and going back to all the things I've said or done that could have led to a particular assumption on me. Goodness! All I did was to follow an order from higher-up and now I'll be going on a long vacation?!? As Ellen DeGeneres would say it her show, "What?!?"

Whew!!! This is a very delicious gossip if it wasn't about me! hehehehe Seriously, I don't have an iota of an idea as to what instigated this fantastic assumption. Oh well, I guess, I should take it as a good sign that I'll probably go on A VERY LONG VACATION in the near future!

I'm not angry nor irritated nor agitated, not even itsy, bitsy, teensy, weensy trace of annoyance. Honestly, I'm more of bewildered and in awe of their powers of deduction. Goodness, and I actually believed I'm smart!

命中注定我愛你

This is probably the most watched idol drama in Taiwan ever, 命中注定我愛你, or Fated to Love You in English.

I almost didn't watched this series because I wasn't so crazy about the lead actor. Why? I was hoping that another actor would play the part (because I am always, and still is, a fan of 明道 and 陳喬恩 tandem) but, I found the teaser interesting so I told myself, give it a couple of episodes then I'll decide it I'd rather go to sleep or stay up late.

The story is actually quite simple. It's about an ordinary girl who went on a cruise with her boyfriend and hoped to take their relationship to the next level. On the other hand, this rich guy took the cruise with a grand plan of a wedding proposal to his ballerina girlfriend. But the hands of fate (aided by a couple of clumsy men and a rather selfish girlfriend) directed these two to meet in the most incredible circumstance. Funny and touching situations followed and the craziest group of supporting characters will make you laugh then cry, well, most of the time at the same time.

Two sundays to go and I'll be saying goodbye to 紀存希 and 陳欣怡 (I'm not exactly panicking because there will be DVDs and what have you! hehehehe). I will surely miss these two characters that made me smile and sigh and sob every Sundays.

Oh, by the way, where in the world did rubber duckie go?

When it's so much fun to just laugh.....

I've been trying to think of something interesting and witty to write for the last couple of days. I've been typing and deleting, then type and delete again. It has become such an easy way out for me to tell myself, I'll probably come up with something tomorrow. Well, that's not going to happen tonight... I will type anything that will come to mind and it won't be such a big deal for me if it does not make any sense. Whatever makes sense to me does not necessarily makes sense to you and vice versa.

I've always been taught that if everything else fails, laugh. It may sound, well, come to think of it, it does sound crazy. But, it works for me.

I don't know why but I always manage to put myself in such a fix that I suffer so much from migraine attacks and bouts of indigestion. I even got myself diagnosed with stomach flu although I'm still not even sure if there is such a sickness but that's what I heard from my doctor and I'm not saying otherwise!

Anyway, it was such a torture to have your head felt like cracking up with pain every sunday nights. Yes, I have regular migraine attacks every sunday night for almost 10 years. It can be from the mildest of discomfort to have all the rock bands in the world having a concert inside your head, specifically on only one side of your head. I've avoided taking pain killer as much as I can because I don't want to develop addiction of any kind but, lately, I decided to not make myself suffer and take whenever an ordinary massage can't help.

Okay, so why sunday nights in particular? I think, maybe because tomorrow is Monday, the start of work week... Seriously, it's exhausting to manage a business when the economy is not exactly bright and rosy. (This was exactly when I confirmed why I so dislike to study anything connected with Commerce in college, but, then again, that's exactly what my college degree is! hehehe) It's also the same case when I seeked employment elsewhere. Monday was such a depressing thought for me that my head began to throb with pain with the sun sets every Sunday.

Now, why do I say that laughter is the best medicine? Somehow, laughter is what got me through the migraine attacks and the bouts with indigestion. Laughter has effective erased whatever angst I may have with my life. Laughter has taught me to deal with people who are as difficult as me. In a nutshell, laughter has allowed me to live my life.

I can laugh at anything, or should I say that I'm learning now to focus more on the humorous side of life instead of emphasizing on the negative aspect. It can be a mere thought of a song, a place, a scene from a tv series, my nephew's naughty antics or basically what humor I can find from anything.

Laughter is the best medicine, not only for the physical sickness but for my emotional and mental well-being. I may give in to a frown here and there but at the end of the day I'll be having a goofy smile that says that everything's just fine.

Bonding Time

Quality time with family is really something that can't be bought with the most valued currency or with the most precious stones. At the risk of sounding too idealistic (yeah, there's a bit of it left somewhere... hehehehe), I felt the veracity of the statement, "money can't buy you everything."

One doesn't need to go to expensive restaurants or to go on grand tours to be able to bond with your family. All that is needed is the love in your hearts and the rest will follow naturally.

A simple trip to the mall and an hour of chatting about everything and anything important and inanities are enough to make me feel how lucky and loved I am!

My Favorite 華語歌曲

背影 【林宥嘉】
彩虹 【張心傑】
到不了 【范瑋琪】
感情綫 【Tension】
紅豆 【王菲】
花香 【許紹洋】
快樂 【張智成】
那些日子 【陶晶瑩】
捕夢人 【潘裕文】
三暝三日 【吳宗憲】
笑着流淚 【楊采妮】
我愛的人 【林宥嘉】
我恨我愛你 【張惠妹】
我難過 【5566】
小鎮姑娘 （陶喆】
心有林夕 【林宥嘉】
心願便利貼 【元若潔&吳忠明】
旋木 【袁惟仁】
葉子 【阿桑】
遇見 【孫燕姿】
趁早 【張宇】
追 【張國榮】

My Favorite 電視連續劇

愛上女主播 (All About Eve)



放羊的星星 (My Lucky Star)



宮 (Princess Hours)
豪門本色



還珠格格 1, 2 (Princess of the Returning Pearl 1, 2)



流星花園 (Meteor Garden)



秒手仁心 1, 2 (Healing Hands 1, 2)



名揚四海 (Friends)



命中注定我愛你 (Fated to Love You)



秋天的童話 （Endless Love)



大時代 (Greed of Man)



天龍八部 (The Demi Gods and Semi Devils)



天使之翼



王子變青蛙 (Frog Prince)



微笑 Pasta (Smiling Pasta)



我和疆死有個約會1，2，3 (My Date with a Vampire 1, 2, 3)




笑傲江湖 (State of Divinity)



笑看風雲 (Instinct)



刑事偵緝檔案 1，2， 3 (Detective Investigation Files 1，2，3)



薰衣草 (Lavender)



再世情緣



麻雀愛上鳳凰

我是中國人

Today is the 8th day of the 8th month of year 2008 and, officially, at 8:00pm tonight, the Summer Olympics games had opened at Beijing, China.

Watching the ceremony on TV (how I wished I was right there in person!), it made me so proud to be Chinese. It's not the amount of money spent on the production or how colorful and magnificent the fireworks were or how jaw-dropping the performances were. It's the realization that China has come a long way and what an incredible journey it was.

Not for Sensitive Skin

Disclaimer: No, this is not in any way connected to anything dermatological in nature.

Take away the irritation, annoyance and frustration, I should be extremely grateful to my so-called "friends" who had intentionally (or, hopefully, unintentionally) misconstrued my every action and misinterpreted my every word. Their "concern" has helped me develop an immunity to anything and everything not nice thus curing me from that uncomfortable state of having sensitive skin.

Oh yes, I suffered so much, well, mostly, emotionally, with my sensitive skin before. I was so incredibly sensitive back then that I used to cry (oh yes, I did shed all those tears, believe me!) at the slightest provocation.

Fortunately for me, I had help with my "treatment." Real friends who never withdrew their support, family who never lessened their life and time who never forced me to face life head on until it's right for me to do so.

User-friendly

I can't remember exactly when we started to use the term "user-friendly". Initially, we used it in jest but, we've come to a realization that, indeed, there is a user-friendly in each of us.

For others, the term user-friendly maybe a big turn-off. Personally, I say that it depends on how you practice the concept. You can be a user-friendly person but in a nice way, meaning, you "use" other people's strengths to gain something but in return, you allow yourself to be used as well. Or you can be that user-friendly person that everybody wants to avoid, meaning you abuse other people's trust and talent for your personal gain. Everything, of course, is dependent on how you would execute the concept (hehehehe).

Here's an advice, when you practice the concept, please, don't make it too obvious. Don't act as it you're all good and kindness towards the person you're planning to use then deliberately ignore him/her after you're done with him/her. You might not get the chance to "use" that person again. What's worse? You'll probably lose your "usefulness" as well.

Heads or Tails?

For every issue that people argue, discuss and, basically, disagree about, we are taught that it always has two sides to it. The question, on which side are we on.

For somebody like who aspires to remain neutral as long as I can, this is a mind-boggling situation. Who should I favor? In first place, how would I be able to distinguish who is right? Or should I say, the lesser of two evils?

Whose side should I take? The one who decides with his heart or the one who puts logic over emotions?

Maybe I should just toss a coin and see on which side it would land....

Rain, rain

Rain, rain, please stay
I beg you not to go away
I want to sleep all day....

It's raining real hard all day today. There's no typhoon or storm (I'm ashamed to admit that I'm still not sure what's the difference between these two weather phenomenon! hehehehe) that causes the non-stop rain. I guess, it's that time of the year.

One Day at a Time

One thing I realized last Friday is that almost everybody around me has become health-conscious. They're into blood tests and consultations on all symptoms presently known to mankind and then some.

Personally, I'm doctor-phobic. Meaning? I'd rather not know any illness that I may be sufferring from instead of hearing all those eye-boggling medical terms that could trigger brain-crushing migraine. It's not good, right? I know. Somehow, I'm more at peace with that and, I guess, less stressful.

Yes, less stressful, because I believe that a lot of those medical problems stem from too much stress in our life. So, I'm opting to take life one day at a time. Instead of thinking so much of what will happen, I will sit back and smell the roses. Problems will come however we try to avoid it anyway. And, instead of thinking of how other people will look at my person, I will think of how I will live my life. No one would suffer nor enjoy the consequences of my actions but me so i see no reason why should I give so much importance to their opinion.

Life is too short to keep on thinking what others think of me. They don't live my life for me. I do.

Now, if only my friends will remind me about this entry the next time I hear bad things being said about me....

Last Day Alive

If today is my last day alive, what will I do?

Hmm.... since I don't have anything material to speak of, I guess, all I will do is to say "thank you" and "sorry" to everybody who had been a part of my life directly or indirectly, knowingly or unknowingly, happily or unhappily.

If you really think about it, what's there left to do? The more you try to think of all the things that you should do, the more you can't let go. So, I'd rather leave this world with a lightness in my heart and a smile on my face than be burdened with the distribution of material wealth. Come to think of it, that's irrelevant in my case because I don't have anything to distribute, well, except for my treasured collection of Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys books!

Lesson Learned

I am slowly but surely learning to not care. Sounds harsh? But that's the most important lesson to learn if you want to survive in this jungle also known as the workplace...

I don't how it happened or when it happened, but I have developed an unbelievably thick skin... In fact, I've turned into a cynic. Any comments, be it positive or negative, be it about me or somebody else, I always react with a smirk. I'm not sure what my smirk implied but, for now, I really don't care anymore. I've been called and thought of in the worst possible way, so I believe, nothing will ever unfaze me now.

Like I said in my earlier blog, it's easier to be not nice and boy, I'm beginning to have fun, too....