Kuya's Girl

Aside from being a Papa's girl, I must say I'm also a Kuya's girl, especially to my second older brother. One can say he kindah spoiled me with material stuff and attention, but, more than that, my Kuya is also one of the few people I can be myself without any fear of consequences. I can be funny, bitchy, nice, angry or even stupid with him and I can be very sure that I won't be judged. I miss my Kuya and one of my dearest wish is to be able to visit him and hear him sing (since he's been bragging how good he is now!).

Headaches

After taking into careful consideration the factors that could possibly attibute to my excruciating and extremely inconvenient headaches, I finally realized that I have several options to mark as causes:
1. late nights - blame it to blogging! seriously, i enjoy the chatting, surfing and other stuff you can do that sleep seemed to be a bother.
2. perfume - oh yeah! blame it to smell pollution.
3. caffeine overdose - now that is one factor I would never admit to even if it's true!



*photo courtesy of www.flickr.com

Changes

Again, I'm standing at a crossroad. I need to decide should I make a turn or stay put. Mercy! I so do not like this feeling. I have always been more comfortable with the familiar but I am very much aware that although change could be scary, it's the very thing that could make me a stronger person.

Of course, I know that there is no perfect situation. Somehow, someway, there will be something we won't be agreeable with. But, it's how we handle situation that would make it perfect. Now if only I can find that skill and, maybe then I won't be scared of change anymore.

Insecurity and Selfishness

It's a sad, sad thing to see people being eat up with insecurity and selfishness that they forget their humanity. Admittedly, I also have my insecurities and I do have my bouts of selfishness but I do try to escape from these traps. Insecurity erodes not only your zest for life but the innate goodness in yourself as well. Selfishness re-focuses your energy to what you want at all cost with nary a thought to what is right.

Fairy Tale

I don't know about you but I grew up thinking that the life is like a fairy tale. If you did something good, you'll be rewarded and every story ends happily ever after.

Well, I'm now actually pushing 40 and, well, I don't see any fairy tale unfolding (yet!).... Not that I'm expecting one because the bubble had already burst, like so 10 years ago, but somehow therein lies STILL a romantic in me. Although I'm not thinking anymore in terms of weddings and stuff (time to get real!), I dream now of a peaceful life (and successful won't be all that bad).

Tupperware Party

At the risk of being eternally ostracized in my workplace (hehehe), I'm still gonna say this, I have realized that for five days a week, I'm attending a big tupperware party. Why? I had learned that true friendships are rare among co-workers. Everybody (oh yeah, the list does include me sometimes) has ulterior motives that require to use (and, for the ambitious, abuse) other people, plus we have monthly income to boot!

Patience is Virtue

For the longest time this has always been a funny thing for me (please forgive if I had or, most probably, will offend anybody), but I have always say this, Patience is virtue, unfortunately I'm not a virtuous person. Funny right? Admit it, you're laughing yourself sick. Okay, there's a shadow of a smile trying to break free....

Seriously, I really envy those people whose patience runs deeper than the abyss. They can honestly enjoy the luxury of the wait and bask at their ultimate success. Me? Nah..... I'm an antsy person (might come from all those MUGS of coffee I've had?). I want things done RIGHT NOW or NOT AT ALL. Contradicting? Yeah, oxymoronic even! hehehehe

I've tried to be really patient with people, places and things around me. Scout's Honor! I tried to mask any impatience I might be feeling with a smile or I'll just think of some inanities to humor myself. In fairness, it did work FOR A WHILE. The bad thing there is that all the impatience have amassed to such an infinite quantity.

It's so hard not to explode at the slightest provocation (it could be a careless comment, nonchalance or I just happen to not like that person's face at the moment! hehehe) and I honestly believe that I'm starting to develop a personality discorder with all this control.

Ang Taba Mo!

Promise, the moment I hear the comment, "Ang Taba Mo!" one more time.... grrrrrr!!!!!!! Kasama ba sa listahan ng physical injuries ang manapak?!?

I'm not naman denying the fact na OO, MATABA AKO, pero kailangan pang ulit-ulitin yun na parang wala na akong ibang nagawang maganda o may saysay kahit kaunti sa buhay maliban sa katabaan ko? Nakakapikon na....

Cute bang tanungin ako nang, "pumapayat ka yata?" Haller?!? Malabo lang mata ko, hindi ako bulag! There's no need na magpaka-plastic pa! Diretushin na nang matapos pero ang frustration ko lang dyan eh wala na bang ibang masasabi sa akin kundi yun?!? Oo, alam ko, masagwang tingnan, hindi kaaya-aya, at kung anu-ano pang nega pang reaction. But, this is me! Kung hindi nyo kayang tanggapin ako, cellulites and all, eh thank you very much na lang po. Pero, tama na talaga at malapit na akong magwala!